Throughout history, different cultures have developed and evolved to where they become legends for a certain entity. For instance, the Athenians were known for their philosophy, the Prussians for efficiency, and the French for their ability to surrender. We are now going to decide which society should be known for the worst teeth: the English or the Indians. This a full out onslaught on who are the true deniers of dentistry. We are going to layout flawless logic why the English are and still the reigning champions when it comes to indiscriminate displacement and misalignment of teeth.

English inhabitants originally evolved from a species of water creature named Hemipristis elongatus or in layman’s terms the Snaggletooth Shark. The English’s lack of oral hygiene is mocked in movies like “Austin Powers.” Further, the English had to get a Scotsman to play their most successful spy, James Bond, because all of their native thespians sported filled chompers. I do concede that India does have some gnarly ineffiencies of incisors, but upon further examination this can be explained with two simple explanations. One, Indian food does not require chewing. Two, Indians are merely trying to show off their nationalism. The national animal of India is of course the toothless tiger. What better way is there to show off that true national gumption without going through years of painstakingly terrible and inadequate brushing. One can also argue that they only developed bad teeth during the British occupation of India. As the great George Macartney once said, “The sun never sets on bad British teeth.”

In Dentistry,

-Taters