Ah the women of video games. Is there not a better platform to project man’s vision of what the perfect woman looks and acts like? It’s like The Notebook for guys. Game programmers have the ability to take seemingly impossible versions of our female counterparts and make them life-like. That’s why in this week’s Top 5 we are going to count down the Top 5 Female Video Game Characters. Of course as the closet gamer of the group, I take deep pride in this list. We encompass everything from NES systems all the way to present day digital divas.

The List:

5) Mario Bros: Peach- the first video game lady, literally, that all of us vividly remember. You have to be pretty awesome to cause an Italian plumber to continuously siege castles and fight large lizard-like, reptilian kidnappers. She also must be a bit of a party girl because she does not seem to mind who gets her, Mario or Lugi, or the amount of shrooms and flame throwing flowers they eat.

4) Street Fighter: Chun Li- She is an absolute must. Listen, generally I am not a big fan of a girl that I know could whoop my ass but Chun Li is the exception. First, she has that exotic look coming from the Far East and the speed kicks could become useful if you ever need to knock doors down. Let’s just says she “kicks it up a notch.”

3) Mortal Kombat: Sonya Blade- This comes down to one thing with Sonya: imagination. Think about what this girl could do when you already know that she can drop you with a kiss. Yeah, a kiss. Think about that for a second.

2) Mass Effect 2: Miranda- One of the hottest new wave characters to come out. Anybody that has played Mass Effect 2 spent the majority of time trying to hook up with her. She is smart and can do some pretty sweet magic tricks which could come in handy when you’re bored. Besides, you probably spent more time trying to get with her than you did with an actual girl.

1) Tomb Raider: Laura Croft- When Angelina Jolie cannot do you justice, you know you have to be the hottest video game character of all time. She’s got whit, grit, and she’s the shit. Every guy has played or seen this game. She raids tombs in short jean shorts and packs two Desert Eagle pistols on her hips. She can open locked doors, out-think archaic traps, and fights off terrorists. She is a sexy cartoon video game version of a female Swiss Army Knife. ‘Nuff said.

Raiding Tombs,

-Taters